Feeling smug when I see a singleton pram

Especially when that baby is crying. 

I have become so smug since having my twins. 

If you knew them, you’d understand why. I wish I had a pound for every time someone asks me if I am getting any sleep. And I wish I had another pound for every time those people looked stunned when I said they have slept through the night more or less since they were 9 weeks old. No ridiculous Gina Ford training here! 

I have been to quite a few baby clinics where people will look completely dishevelled or come in clutching a million bags then say how tired they are because their baby refuses to sleep. It’s quite the norm. I started out feeling guilty for having a full night’s sleep and carrying a small backpack for both girls. It was almost as if I had to apologise for having freakishly well behaved babies. 

But now, whenever I see someone walking along with just(!) one baby, I feel a massive sense of smugness. “How do you do it?” they all say. “They sleep at least nine hours each night, rarely cry and are as good as gold during the day,” I smugly reply, manouevering my enormous double pram with one hand. 

Best pregnancy clothes

Some of my tips. 

I absolutely love clothes. I have far too many. But when I got pregnant, I told myself I would not end up with a brand new wardrobe for the sake of six months (although I did start wearing maternity jeans at nine weeks). 

By far, the best maternity clothing is from America. Especially if you are tall. They have brilliant shops and some specifically for maternity wear that don’t cost an arm and a leg (I’m looking at you, Seraphine). When I was in Tennessee last year, I bought quite a lot of clothes from Target (probably the best stuff ever!), A Pea In The Pod and Motherhood Maternity. 

Shorts. These shorts are the BEST and I wish I could get away with wearing them now, they are beyond comfortable. The stretchy band feels like a loose swimming costume. So comfy. 

Work trousers. I bought a pair of work trousers from America which I can’t find online. They are by far the best work trouser I found. They were skinny and had the elastic at the back rather than the front. This made such a difference when I was sat at my desk all day. I didn’t have elastic digging in to my expanding stomach all day! 
High street. I found Topshop maternity clothes to be nice but very overpriced. H&M did the trick but jeans were awful. New Look jeans were the best, I found. But not very long. I wish Next was better last year because this season looks lovely! 

Don’t buy a coat. I just used my husband’s instead. Don’t shell out £100 on something you’ll only wear for a few months. Chances are you’ll be sweating profusely anyway. Just wear extra layers if you’re cold. 

Bras. Get a non-wired bra as early as possible and you won’t regret it. Mothercare do two-packs which are not too pricey. 

Weddings. Chances are you’ll have a wedding to go to. My tip is to buy a maxi dress so you can wear comfy sandals and no one will know. Also get a stretchy dress for when you eat loads of cake (the baby needs energy…). 

Things I wish I knew last year

When I found out I was expecting twins, my mind started racing with a million questions. Questions I didn’t know the answer to. Questions I wish I knew the answer to.

Here are just some of the things I questioned during all those sleepless nights in my third trimester and what I think is the correct answer now.

How do I feed both at the same time?
Answer: You don’t. I bottle fed both my babies to start with, which was a decision made pretty much the second I saw two sacs in my 13 week scan. Kudos to those ladies who tandem feed but there’s no way I was even going to try, I personally didn’t want to feel like a cow and selfishly, I wanted to have lie ins on Saturdays. Even after having my twins, one of the midwives asked me how I was planning to feed them once my husband went back to work, I said at the same time using a feeding pillow. She quickly said, “No. Feed one at a time and they’ll quickly learn they have to wait.” Best. Advice. Ever. This has massively helped as I have been weaning them on to food because if I am feeding one twin, the other sits relatively patiently for hers (depending on what the food is, that is. If they see a yoghurt pot, I get both shouting at me for it).

What if they cry at the same time?
Answer: Then they cry at the same time. Much like feeding, they just have to wait. Sometimes I find myself holding one baby when feeding her and contorting my body into really bizarre shapes (thank goodness I am hypermobile) to pass something to the other baby to try and settle her. Then other times, they just both cry. For no reason. They’re babies. Babies cry.

How do I pick them up at the same time?
Answer: Don’t. Don’t even try. Only now they are 8 months am I sort of able to pick them up at the same time, but they are too wriggly so I tend not to do it. Only for posing for photos. It’s just too risky picking them both up at the same time if you are alone. I even watched some YouTube videos on how to pick up twins but they all looked awful so I just don’t bother.

How many nappies do I need?
Answer: Far more than you can possibly imagine. I didn’t have a typical baby shower (I hate the idea of people feeling like they have to buy me gifts, although I love a gift), but my husband went out for a final blow out before the babies arrived. All he asked was for everyone to bring a pack of nappies. We ended up with hundreds and didn’t buy a pack of nappies until the girls were three months old. The majority of the guys had been to Aldi and saw how cheap they were so bought multiple packs. “Babies are cheap,” one said. Ha. Now they are 8 months old and tend to go through about six nappies a day each. Sometimes more, depending on what they had for dinner the night before.

How much milk do they go through?
Answer: We use Aptamil 1 (I wish I researched this more, it’s the most expensive and I didn’t want to change after starting them on it as it suited them fine) and for the first month or so we were using a tub a week, but then as they were drinking more it ended up as two tubs a week. Now they have three 8oz bottles a day each and I buy a tub every five days rather than seven.

How do you bathe twins?
Answer: With help. Never alone. We have two Angelcare baby bath supports and they are wonderful. They’re quite bulky but they have hooks so you can hang them on the wall — they stack. We wash the girls every other day. Every kid I know with skin problems or eczema is put in the bath every day. My girls don’t have a bit of crust on them. Babies don’t get dirty.

What do babies wear?
Answer: This might sound like the most ridiculous question but at the hospital they drum it into you that babies need loads of layers (they even make them wear hats indoors for God’s sake), and that babies should be in one layer more than you would wear. But sometimes I feel that is WAY too hot. The weather changes so quickly. Some babies are really sweaty. My Twin 1 is super sweaty and doesn’t like too many layers. I just play it by ear, but I get really frustrated when I see people in 20 degree heat with their babies under blankets with jumpers on and hats. Babies can tell you when they are cold but they can’t tell you when they are too warm. It’s a really vile phrase but, “A cold baby cries, a hot baby dies.” I just wish more people would consider this when dressing their babies. Oh, and I wish I knew that 0-3 months does not mean birth to 3 months.